People like my ovaries..they're party girls!

News

2010-11-04T00:26:00.003-07:00

I have a new blog. Should anyone still be coming here and wish to read my new blog please email me at: PixieChickAZ@Gmail.com and I will be happy to give you the link provided you are not genetically related to me. Or if I've recently divorced you. Or if you're a fucktard. Or you're obnoxious. Ok just kidding on most of those. Not only am I blogging again, but I'm also participating in this years NaNoWriMo. What in the hell was I thinking? It's not like I have a lot of free time. We are homeschooling, moving across the country, and suddenly my baby is running everywhere, getting into everything, and generally wreaking all kinds of havoc on us, our pets, etc.

Anyhow, here is my little guys first Halloween. Please feel free to email me if you would like the link to my new blog.

Mommyhood

2010-04-29T01:49:00.003-07:00

Maybe I am just old, though I never think of 33 as old, but being a new mother is seriously kicking my ass. I don't remember the other two leaving me this deep down exhausted way down to the bones. Although, I also never was the parent to a child quite like this one. My Max has given me a run for my money his whole life. He never ever slept through the night. I'd wake up to find him looking for ingredients to a potion that would give him super powers, forming a parachute for the cat out the second story window. There were plenty of times I wasn't sure he'd survive the toddler years. Broken bones and stitches seemed quite common. Max also didn't crawl until he was 9 months old. He didn't walk until he was 14 months old.

This brings us to the little character I have brought into this world. Owen is a h.a.n.d.f.u.l.l. Just barely 4 months old now and is into EVERYTHING already. He can't crawl yet really. Instead he chooses to plant his face into the carpet and push himself to where he needs to go with his feet, while his face drags along. He stops his swing by grabbing the bars and proceeds to try to get out. On a few occasions he's been successful. We got one of those ridiculous Bumbo seats for $35 bucks and he just tips that bad boy right over, and falls out to escape. What does this all mean? Future daredevil? Maybe, but definitely a stress inducing spoiled little guy.

I have resigned myself to the fact that I will not be sleeping much. I realize my perfume for the next several months is going to be soy formula puke. All this is worth it as this baby is the light of my life. His personality is hilarious. I've been told most children that were preemies have a harder time getting socialized, and truth be told he is verrrrry spoiled since I've not been working. If a stranger even looks at him wrong he pouts then screams. The lower lip thing already is a riot, and he's had that down pat since he was 2 months old. Our new thing now is fake coughing. He will cough then grin when I look at him. I will close this with a million annoying mommy brag photos of him because of course I believe him to be one of the prettiest things I've ever laid eyes on. The last few days though have left me wishing the teething tablets you find had some prozac in them! If every tooth is going to be this dramatic I believe we will both need prozac before he's one. Now some photos, feel free to click for full size.

Seriously....I never thought I'd become an obnoxious housewife bragging about her cute baby....

Happy Valentine's Day

2010-02-15T01:03:00.004-07:00

This is how I woke up this morning. To this face. My god those cheeks!! I ended up with a cheeky baby. YES!!! I'm ashamed to admit that we're still co-sleeping. I've been working on putting him in the crib more and more. Last night he squawked and I put him in bed with me to which he showed his approval for by instantly rolling on his tummy and sleeping six hours straight. YES SIX. Daddy works nights so Owen gets that side. Tonight we had a date to watch Whip It but he went to sleep. Tomorrow he has a two month check up and I've already been crying at the thought of him having shots. He hasn't had shots yet in my presences since I was sliced and diced to remove him and he was in NICU. This is pretty much going to suck!!!!

So I peed on a stick this morning and thankfully it was negative. You know when I thought I was pregnant with Owen I peed on many sticks. Probably 3o. After I got the positive I had to make sure I stayed pregnant. I've always had a hard time staying that way. We're great examples Scott and I. Seventeen year old daughter living in my house "Use a condom!" when we clearly don't know h0w to. So thankfully as of now Owen will not be having an Irish twin. Don't hold your breath although the thought of going through that again gives me hives, just not real super itchy put on a condom ones!

So of course we celebrated the negative with a dozen roses, breakfast in bed, and sex.

At the end of the day....

2010-02-12T00:26:00.004-07:00

His cheeks are a think of beauty. I keep meaning to blog but I'be been so busy. I may have had a touch of PPD but I think I'm moving past it. How can you not with Owen around?? Plus starting to exercise again is improving my mood. At this point from where I was I've gained over 100 lbs. Though I have not weighed in since Owen was one week old. He's now 8 weeks old. I have a feeling I've lost roughly 40 lbs. What amazes me the most is how much I'm not as out of shape as I thought. I can seriously work out hard and even run. I could have never run this over weight before. So I have much hope.

What I'm not going to do is go crazy. We still have a lot to worry about with Owen as he is still considered a preemie. I don't know much about peds and medicine but I'm told 34/35 weekers are the most difficult because of their fussiness and pickiness. Boy is he picky! Right down to a serious fear of the dark. If you turn out the lights around him he really loses it. He's so very very happy with his Mommy though. This means I may not be able to go back to work for another month or two. No problem we can belt tighten.

Owen also helped Daddy propose to me with a seriously gorgeous ring. I'm so afraid I will lose it! I will have to post a picture soon for those that aren't on my facebook. No real plans for a wedding yet. We're happy so I'm not going to push it!

I will write more and post more photos again soon I must try and sleep while he's sleeping for now. Is anyone else exercising using the Wii? I am so happy with EA Active and Wii Fit!!!!

Am I the only one who has noticed?

2009-12-26T13:27:00.003-07:00

Zoolander

Owen.

I really think it's the hair.

Ok so it was worth it..completely

2009-12-22T21:18:00.005-07:00

Baby Cheeky 12/14/09 born via emergency c-section cause he's like me we like to be shocking. We're both ok. Long week in the hospital, he was in NICU but is perfect. I'd absolutely do it over and may even have another. Ask me after the incision heals.

2 weeks...

2009-12-02T19:23:00.002-07:00

I can live that long this fat, right? right. Should this child choose not to listen to my pleas for his eviction I will be having the baby in two weeks. There have been many pleas. Many of them late night resulting in me waking up flat on my back with my tailbone feeling like it's on the outside of my body.

I.Am.So.Ready.

Good birth control

2009-11-27T13:13:00.002-07:00

35 weeks

Stick a fork in me....

2009-11-25T23:34:00.002-07:00

I'm tired. I'm also toeing the line between sane and nervous breakdown. My blood sugars are fine but still he grows. Last check at 34 weeks they estimated him at 8 lbs. Plus I have 3 x as much amniotic fluid as I should. So I haven't felt much like writing. Just a lot of crying. God bless Scott as I think I'd be a mental patient at this point without him. So basically I started a web site for our family to get updates from. I'm really depressed and don't even feel like answering the phone to anyone. If anyone would like the link please email me and I'll give it if I know you. PixieChickAZ@gmail.com Also I'm on facebook fairly regularly so you can find me there also, will tell you how if you email me. Maybe.

My kids both came down with H1N1. The boy version did surprisingly well considering he was younger and his symptoms came on really really fast. The girl version of moi my little mini me had a really tough time. It went on and on and on. Finally she was better then 3 days later she woke up and couldn't see. Long story short she wound up spending a week in the hospital for excess fluid on the brain. They thought they'd have to put a shunt in but knock on wood so far she's fine and back to herself again. I think I have yet to recover emotionally or physically from that.

We do anticipate this little guys arrival any time. I say half hoping he'll hear me and make his way to the exit.

Have I mentioned tubal ligation?

The fat fetus

2009-10-21T22:21:00.003-07:00

I think I need a whole new blog called the fat fetus. It's pretty fucked up to be told your fetus is fat and needs to slow down with the weight gain. Now when people stop me and ask me when I'm due or if I'm about to pop I just feel like answering..."Welllll...you see...I have a fat fetus."

I decided it should be illegal to force a pregnant woman to follow some crazy diet. It was really cute when my Dietician started talking about the food pyramid to me. I know that shit like the back of my hand! However when you're pregnant there is this whole other category called DELICIOUSNESS. Everything tastes delicious. And I'm sorry but if a bowl of plain old oatmeal and a pumpkin pie blizzard both give me the same reading what am I supposed to choose? Not that I've tried this mind you...that was an..err...theory is all.

So the hospital registers a woman with gestational diabetes and has you write down what you want for your first meal. I was told most women select chocolate cake. Fuck that! First of all at night I dream of tall ice cold glasses of milk. And right behind that milk is a big helping of chips and salsa from my favorite restaurant. Screw the cake! I can have sugar free cake at home that tastes just as good. Bring me bread! Wrapped around some ice cream!

So I start on insulin tomorrow to see if it will help with the growth of my fat fetus. The way the doctors all speak to me I feel like he's in there in a diaper already ready to come into this world sumo style. Poor little guy. I just think it's completely fucked up all around that my whole life is now revolving around food.

I wonder if I can fit fuck in a post anymore? Probably but I have to go make my before bed snack. I'll have some air..with a side of more air.

So...I have a fat baby

2009-10-15T10:30:00.003-07:00

So no matter what I eat good or bad my blood sugars have been terrible. I feel like crap! Once again I have to ask how people with diabetes can live like this. If my number is near 200 I feel like I drank 10 red bulls. It sucks! The dietician is giving me 2 more days then it's meds. Now, knowing what I know I am aware that insulin is going to be the only answer so why the fuck not just start me on it now?

I had the growth scan on my man yesterday and everyone was in shock. He's fat! He should weigh around 2 lbs right now and he weighs FOUR. So can we just stop messing around and start the meds? Duh! I also informed the high risk specialist that I will be having a c-section. While I've never had one of those before I am positive my vagina should not have to go through pushing out a 12 lb baby. Nooooo wayyyy! She-ra and I have discussed this and agree that she's not down for that.

I'm so tired of being pregnant. I'm depressed, I cry all the time, and I'm just over this. Every dr's visit is bad news. The kind that ends with...and your baby could die. Therefore I end up dreaming at night about his funeral, about him dying, etc. And Scott says to me, hopefully our next one.... Hold up! Our next one can come from the far off land of Vietnam or China. My. Vagina. Is. Closed.

To illustrate my point this is our guy 3.5 weeks ago:

(notice how he won't show us his face? Shy!)

And this is our guy yesterday...GINORMOUS:

Can we just slow down?

2009-09-29T18:44:00.003-07:00

I think I blogged before about how I'm really bad at keeping track of this pregnancy. Part of it is just because everything has been high risk this and that, I think I just blank out how far along I am. I think I just spent like 3 weeks at 25 weeks. I just realized a while ago that I'm 28 weeks pregnant now and only have 85 days to go.

And, I. AM. FREAKING. OUT.

Why is it going so quickly? I'm definitely not ready. I feel like my house needs to be scrubbed top to bottom. I need a car seat. I need more bottles. Am I breastfeeding? I need to decide!

With the holidays coming this is going to fly by. I feel like things need to slow down a little bit. I'm so scared! Not of having a baby, but of all the complications and of not being ready. This whole pregnancy I've had these freak outs. One night it was "OH MY GOSH WE DON'T HAVE ANY SOCKS FOR THE BABY!!" Scott fixed that. Then it was bibs. Right now it's the car seat.

When this is over Scott is going to need a medal.

Maybe I should be like other pregzillas and get one of those tracker things for my facebook? Nah....

Must love hormones

2009-09-25T23:13:00.002-07:00

I believe there was a collective scream heard round the world from pregnant women everywhere this week. NINETEEN POUNDS?! Holy........ I saw that baby's picture and felt scared. I figured right away I'd be having nightmares. The regular sized baby next to him looks like a little chew toy for him. Come here..I'm teething..let me gnaw on your head!

Pregnant nightmares are nothing new. I recall dreaming when I was pregnant before that I was at a baseball game and went into labor. No one would help me so for whatever reason I had a scalpel in my purse and proceeded to give myself a c-section.

This pregnancy is different in that my blood pressure has been a really huge problem. So now I will wake up and feel like crud because the dreams scared me so bad my b/p is off the charts.

I've been really happy we're having a boy. My son is so much fun. Though I don't think I'd have cared either way the prospect of a boy still excites me. I recall all the times my little guy woke me up at night. "Can you skydive without a parachute?" At 3 am this translates to "Haul your tired ass out of bed and see what the kid is doing."

Now..he's invading my sleep! Last night I dreamed he walked in the front door just covered in bees. "Look Mom, I'm wearing a bee suit!" In my dream he was laughing like it was the funniest thing he'd ever done. Needless to say, both my sleep self and awake self were just not amused.

25 wks

2009-09-17T13:31:00.004-07:00

So we went Monday and the little guy is just fine. I know this because I saw him pee inside of me during the ultrasound. I think he's a bit cheeky already. He also yawned and rolled over as if to say leave me the hell alone. I can't say I blame him as the amounts of poking and prodding this pregnancy pretty much suck all around. So far it's Pregnancy Induced Hypertension, Placenta Previa, Gestational Diabetes, and now it seems at 25 weeks I'm 2 cm dilated. So basically what that means is I can't even have sex anymore which was pretty much the only enjoyment I was getting out of this pregnancy.

It's funny though. When I was pregnant with my son who is the 2nd born child to me I was so freaked out. I was so afraid I'd not love him as much as I love my daughter. How can you love someone else just as much as I loved her when she was born? This time I'm not freaking out. I already love him just as much as I love both kiddos. Perhaps it's being 33 or working with Hospice, this time I'm freaking out I will die in childbirth. You know...just for something new and different I guess.

I've decided my stomach looks like a giant fat baby shelf in front of me. I think it enters the room about 5 minutes before I do. I also keep running into things with my stomach. I'm already clumsy but this is like a whole new dimension. I proclaimed to Scott the other night you know you're a fatass when you shut your stomach in the bathroom door. Of course being the kind man he is he explains to me I'm not a fat ass that it's all baby. YEAH RIGHT! I asked him if that's the case he might want to send that message to my ass which is showing just as much as my stomach.

Let's see if he's still this nice after a week with no sex...

You know bed rest really sucks. I think everyone should be forced to stay home for a week and watch day time television. What the fucking fuck?! It's like my choices are Lifetime TV for women, but what women pick the programming for that crap? The 800 bazillion reality tv shows that are out there now. No thanks. News channels and I'm not even going to go there. Once I hear Nancy Grace's voice I'm outta there. Ok, I do like the paternity test reveals just for the laughs. So I end up just watching Netflix Instant View, Food Network, or On Demand.

There's only so many episodes of Bridezilla a gal can take!

Just random thoughts

2009-09-13T17:12:00.002-07:00

I think gaining weight is just as hard as losing it. Bed rest sucks and I don't really have a whole lot to do other than pick myself apart. I'm sitting here watching my muscles turn into fat more and more everyday wishing I could exercise. I'm already up over 60 lbs and am only 25 weeks pregnant. I'm really watching what I eat too but it doesn't seem to matter. I assume that is the Gestational Diabetes. Having Diabetes sucks also and I really feel for anyone who has it their whole lives. When my blood sugar gets high I don't even need to prick my finger, I know because I feel like complete and utter shit.

I also notice that people say the dumbest crap to you while you're pregnant much like as you lose weight. I've really been going through hell. I don't know how else to describe it. Four weeks ago tomorrow I had some bad findings on my ultrasound. The baby has some things wrong with him. It could be nothing or it could be a few somethings. One of the few somethings means that our little guy will either be stillborn or die shortly after birth. I declined the amnio test which in retrospect was probably the stupidest thing I've ever done. I really that day thought it's all in God's hands and I trust that He won't do this to me. The last week especially has been complete misery for me. I've been so upset I'm not even sleeping. The days pass by very slowly when you're on bed rest and don't sleep. So tomorrow is the recheck of our little guy where I will be asking for the amnio so I have a definite answer.

I can't really talk about this to people. I'm already a pregnant mental case as I cry constantly for no reason. Factor in the above and don't even try to have a conversation with me. I've never cried this much in my life until I was pregnant this time around. I actually had a friend whom I discussed this all with tell me "Well, at least you're fertile enough to have another one." Ummm...I want THIS one. I can't even talk to her anymore right now.

Thank God I have Scott though. This week he's been like my knight in shining armor. He's made up little "dates" with me we can have in our room. The other night he picked out a movie that for 2 hours made me laugh hysterically and forget everything. He even has a little "concession stand" he puts in our room. I really don't know how I'd survive this without him.

Boys!

2009-09-08T03:30:00.003-07:00

Ok, so my daughter and I have the flu. It's been a craptastic few days. It's crappy being this sick when I'm so fat at the same time. Not that this fatness stops me from eating as I always seem famished. I'm just so fat already I feel like a cartoon character!

So Max decides to "help" us out while we're sick. He's like our little caregiver. "Sure I'll get you ice water! Cubed or crushed?"

Just when I'm ready to believe Mr. Max is a mature young man at his ripe old age of 11 all hell breaks lose. "Mommy I'm going to do some housework today to help you." Awwww...I should have known. Several hours later I hear my daughter "Wow the kitchen floor is shiny!!" at the same moment I hear and see the crash of her feet flying out from under her. I rush out to the kitchen and suddenly it's Pregzilla on Ice. W..T...F...

It took me all of 30 seconds to figure out the culprit. There on the counter was too bottles. One bottle of Pine-sol, one bottle of Canola oil.

Mistake or Sabotage we'll never know.....

And to post evidence of the cartoon characterness check this shit out. I'm only 24 effing weeks pregnant! I can't get into my blog roll but will make a new one with updated links as soon as the flu is over. And when I figure out how to get oil off the floor!

There is an overwhelming lack of maturity...

2009-08-30T19:12:00.002-07:00

So Scott and I received a baby monitor in the mail this week. First thought? We can use this!!!! So we practiced a few times and then hid the receiver in my daughter's room. We proceeded to show a few scary movies to set the mood then sent her off to bed.

We had to wait 30 minutes. Thirty painful minutes. Thirty minutes that felt like a lifteme! Then we started calling her name in evil voices into the baby monitor. We were begging to be "let in" dunno from where but it would scare the shit out of me! Nothing was happening so for effect I snuck down the hall and scratched her door, making the dog bark. For a pregnant woman I can haul ass back to my room!

Sadly after that event we are grounded from the baby monitor. She's hidden it in her room. That's ok, I have more ideas!

As for an update, we're all good. I'm a huge fatass but I'm pregnant so don't really care. I'll worry about it later. Kids are both great. I'm not divorced yet but hope that will be over in a few weeks. And Scott and I are doing good. I'm really happy with him, happier than I've ever been. I've decided that also contributes to ass size. I need to be bitter and angry. Oh well!

Off to figure out how to update my blog roll.

101 ways to grow your ass back

2009-08-25T01:16:00.004-07:00

Bed rest since week 9: check
Roughly 50 lbs gained already: Check

At least he looks kinda cute! Actually when I was 17 weeks I had one of those 3D ultrasounds done as I was impatient as to gender. I think he looked kinda like Lord Voldemort.

I mostly just figured as I'm going into the 2nd half of my pregnancy I might as well start blogging again. This has all been pretty eventful thus far. And here for prosperity this is me at 16 weeks. It's much much worse now.